tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619478.post4163018239798543017..comments2023-08-03T07:22:37.744-07:00Comments on Chastity Belt Erotica: Finding her Dark SideGiles Englishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06078027627281038866noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619478.post-6255969479304969482010-09-23T01:57:46.593-07:002010-09-23T01:57:46.593-07:00Thanks! Just posted a response in the main blog......Thanks! Just posted a response in the main blog...Giles Englishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06078027627281038866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619478.post-65469672711234686062010-09-22T20:42:19.330-07:002010-09-22T20:42:19.330-07:00In terms of this post in particular, it's a bi...In terms of this post in particular, it's a bit of a strange one. Women are generally more likely to be honest with themselves about their own sexual desires (which is why they are less likely to develop "fetishes" in their most scientific definition). They are also often more willing to explore and initiate "kinky" sexual content. It does strike me as odd that even with this in mind there are so few Dominant Women out there but at the same time, I think that upbringing and societal norms have a bit to do with that. There's tons of women who are aggressive tops in the bedroom, but very few that classify themselves as Dommes. <br /><br />Going back to the other themes of these posts... a wild card comes to mind when it comes to D/s relationships. That wild card is "true love." True love describes situations where a party is a willing participant in activities they do not enjoy simply out of love for the other (this could be performed by either role). These situations can often steer clear of the conflicts you described.<br /><br />In terms of pre-negotiated relationships, a lot of the potential source of conflicts can probably be traced towards the background of the Domme. If she is active in the BDSM scene she will likely have a very different view of things compared to a hardcore female supremacist. The BDSM scene Domme is much more likely to dole out enjoyable fetish interactions in a "fair" manner whereas the female supremacist is more likely to disregard his desires. <br /><br />In regards to my own experiences I have been in 4 D/s relationships, 3 of which were pre-negotiated and the fourth was instigated by the Domme after beginning as a vanilla relationship. Each was a bit different, the first really flowing along with true love and non-fetish personality conflicts leading to its breakdown. One simply failed to connect deeply on both a fetish and personal level. One connected nearly perfectly on a fetish level but failed on a personal level. My current relationship has a partial overlap in fetishes and several personality conflicts. Overall our true conflicts rarely arose from lack of overlap in the fetish department but those relationships also weren't bound by marriage, legal bondage, etc.<br /><br />Sorry if this seems scattered and all over the place...<br /><br />Let me know if you have any questions and I can try to elaborate more later.fur sissyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06773975470940525031noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619478.post-11726996012660840072010-09-22T20:24:37.054-07:002010-09-22T20:24:37.054-07:00Giles,
I'm sorry it took me so long to commen...Giles,<br /><br />I'm sorry it took me so long to comment but my time and internet have been sporadic over the past month or so.<br /><br />I have been thinking for a long time just how to respond to a few of your posts (especially the one before this one) but I'm really not sure how to go about it.<br /><br />While the breakdown of engaged and disengaged works on a fairly observational level of D/s interactions, the conflict caused by attempting to shift between positions has a few assumptions already made about the style of relationship. Namely, it seems to encompass either a relationship that began vanilla and evolved towards D/s undertones either willingly or unwillingly, a relationship that began vanilla and became D/s through pressure from the male, or a relationship with a foundation in D/s but without full agreement by one involved party. <br /><br />In your post "Getting the femdom action and trappings and still being "authentic"" you made the statement "The best way to experience your femdom fantasy is to find a spot where your darkside overlaps hers." and I agree 100% with this statement. In the BDSM scene this is generally a necessity for a fulfilling long-term romantic relationship to develop and you will find parties that consider the overlap first and foremost when evaluating partners. The courting process is much more difficult for submissive men seeking dominant women than any other demographic in the BDSM realm.<br /><br />I do think that many pre-negotiated D/s relationships end up in the "only one fully willing participant" scenario since men are usually the ones forced to compromise the most in these situations and they are likely to be placed in situations that stray far from their primary fetish fantasies. <br /><br />However, if both individuals have a nearly perfect fetish overlap, there are situations that can steer clear of said conflicts, unless the nature of those conflicts is also part of the overlap, e.g. a man who has a fetish for her withholding pleasurable situations from him. I can also foresee situations that will behave the same simply by having an extremely strict Mistress. <br /><br />(continued in next post).fur sissyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06773975470940525031noreply@blogger.com